Four Girls and Two Guys

At least one!

2011-04-21T08:12:00.000-07:00

You want to know irony? I posted yesterday about going grey... and low and behold, I look into the miror while brushing my teeth and what is sticking straight up from my head. One really white hair. Not even kidding... I'm blaming Madi. One little question and she is making me go grey. Urg. Don't worry, I pulled it out, but my guess is that grey hairs are like roaches. If you see one...

Any grey yet?

2011-04-20T16:07:00.000-07:00

So Madi asked the question today, "Mom, what does it feel like to wear a bra?"

Man, I'm getting old...

Emergency!

2011-03-22T14:27:00.000-07:00

Jack is at the age right now where I feel like he is wanting to fast forward through growing up. He wants to do everything, and do it himself. So, this is a blurb from our Saturday afternoon.

Scott and I are doing something in the kitchen. Jack comes running down the hallway, "Emergency! Emergency!" He is waving his arms and his eyebrows are way up on his little forehead.

We run after him to the bathroom. (Now everyone knows this cannot be good) We round the corner to find the whole bathroom floor covered in water. Where is it spilling out of? The toilet of course. I'm pretty sure there was a whole roll of toilet paper bobbing at the top. I asked Jack "what happened here?" His response, "it wouldn't flush."

Thanks to a wonderful husband that offered to clean it up, I can laugh at the situation. Got to love my little buddy.

The bright side

2010-07-26T14:11:00.000-07:00

I was up in the kitchen today and found a chip out of a dish of mine. I said, "Darn, my serving bowl got chipped."

" Don't worry Mom, look at the bright side, now it looks, you know, old and kind of fancyish," Madi replied to me.

Got to love her. It put a smile back on my face.

A camping first

2010-06-24T12:47:00.000-07:00

I grew up going camping every summer up at Browne Lake. I have continued this tradition with my kids. Here is the thing about Browne Lake, there isn't much there in the way of facilities. Any outhouse sums it up. But, this year they were spraying for some beetles and everyone had to leave the camping area for 24 hours. So, we moved down the road where we had to truly camp, including using the woods as your bathroom. I had never done this will the girls before. It was a first, but I figured it was a skill that needed to be learned. Right? Well, Dad was going to take the girls fishing, so we took a walk out in the woods to take car of business before they left. Allie was a pro ( I have had to help her do roadside pit stops before), totally expected. Hannah was a little concerned, but we finished with dry cloths. Then came Madi. Madi is one of those people who cannot pee under pressure or with an audience. I wasn't sure what to do with her. We tried squatting, holding onto a tree and leaning back, propping herself on a rock, sitting over a dead log, leaning over a rock. I mean everything I could think of, we tried it. At this point she is crying, thinking she isn't going fishing because she can't pee in the woods. So... I let her go fishing.

Well, they come back from fishing and she really needs to go. She went back into the woods by herself and a few minutes later she comes and whispers to me, "Mom, I need to tell you something. I went back into the woods and tried to go again, but I couldn't. Will you take me to a bathroom noooow?"

I looked at her and said, "Madi, it's not that I won't take you to a bathroom, there is no bathroom. There is nowhere I can take you."

So, we went on another walk out in the woods together. We tried everything again and finally I didn't know what to do. So, I looked at her and said, "Madi, people have been peeing out in the woods for thousands of years. If you really need to go, I'm sure you'll figure it out. Just stay out here until you go." And with that I walked back to camp.

Well, about 5 min later Madi comes walking into camp. Her eyes are a little red from crying, but she has this hug smile on her face. I said to her, "So, did you go?" She said, " I sure did." I asked her how she finally did it. She said, " I built myself this toilet thing out of rocks back there." Needless to say, the rest of the time we were there, we didn't have any more problem with her needing to go.

2010-06-14T13:15:00.000-07:00

Dear Mom & Dad,

I'm so sorry for all the complaining, tattling, hitting, screaming, and "woes me" moments. I now know why you sometimes just lost it. I have a new found respect for you. Thank you, I love you. I now ask that you pray for me every moment of this summer vacation because, frankly, I'm on the verge of losing it most of the time.

With love,
Jenny

We've come a long way

2010-05-22T19:21:00.000-07:00

So Madi had her first softball game of the season on Thursday. All was going very well. She got up to bat and I started cheering...nothing embarrassing, just a "you can do it Madi." I saw her look over at me a few times, but thought nothing of it. Well, she struck out, and she was okay with that. But, she walked over to me in the bleachers and said "Mom, I have a favor to ask of you. Will you please not cheer for me like that, you just make me nervous. I can't do this when I'm nervous." I said "okay." She returned to the dugout and the game went on. EVERY parent around me we laughing at this exchange.

Now, although I found some humor in the situation, I was also incredibly relieved that she had so calmly come over and asked me not to cheer. It was only 3 years ago that the same kid came running down the sideline of her soccer game yelling at me, "Stop yelling so loud Mom. I don't want to play this anymore! Why are you making me do this?" So... I think it's safe to say that we have come a long way. Thank goodness!

Sunflower seeds

2010-05-18T09:47:00.000-07:00

Madison is playing softball again this year. It is one of the few sports she likes to play, mainly because there is limited running and you get to sing songs throughout the game. We found out this morning that there is one other very important element for her. She was explaining that she needed to bring some sunflower seeds. She just HAD to have them for her first game (which is tonight). This was her explanation when we asked her why she needed them so badly.

"You just have to have them. Sunflower seeds are the favorite snack for everyone while you wait to bat!"

Ahhhh. Snacks. Definitely something we HAVE to have. :)

cotton candy

2010-05-18T09:30:00.000-07:00

On the way home from the store this morning I had this conversation with Allie.

"Mom? Do clouds taste like cotton candy?"
"No honey, they look like they should, but they don't."
"Yeah, they do Mom. I've tasted them before and they do taste like cotton candy."

What am I supposed to say to that?

Snacks

2010-05-16T12:33:00.000-07:00

We currently have early church. In order for us to be on time we have given Allie a little added responsibility on Sunday mornings. She is in charge of packing the snacks for Jack and herself. So, this morning she got up and did just that. During Sacrament meeting and while munching on her snacks she says, "Man, I sure do pack great snacks, don't I." That kid cracks me up.

The Paco & Taco Show

2010-02-25T06:59:00.000-08:00

Allie has decided that Jack's nickname and her nickname need to change. She now calls Jack, Paco. Her name is Taco. She even taught Jack how to say Paco.

Not sure what to do with that kid.

Just Testing

2010-02-13T10:06:00.000-08:00

My folks came for a visit this past week. In preperation for the trip up to the airport, I invited Allie to go with me. She willingly agreed. Mom packed a lunch, she grabbed her little iPod shuffle and hopped into the car. Within 3 minutes of driving, she was crashed out and slept all the way to the airport.

Having dropped my parents off, we headed home. Something in Allie turned on and for the next 30 minutes she talked without pausing to take a breath. The final 15 minutes of the drive, was DJ Dad time as I tried my best to figure and play the songs she described..."You know Dad, the one that goes da da da da da da, and has the drums."

It was a good ride home and I promised Jenny I'd pick her up a diet Dr. Pepper before I came home. Since Allie was so good, I bought her a Sonic Sweetheart shake. Running out of cup holders, I was forced to put the shake in the backseat cupholder, right next to Allie. I paid the car hop and turned to make sure Allie and the shakes were doing okay.

Both shakes have a big finger width hole in the whipped cream on the top.

"Allie, please don't eat any more of the shakes."

She responds, "Okay, Dad. I was just testing them to make sure they were good."

"That's fine, but no more testing please."

"Okay, Dad. Just so you know that after I tested them, I think their pretty good. We can eat them."

Nothing like a stamp of approval from Allie "the Taste Tester" Fowler!

Out numbered

2010-02-01T21:36:00.000-08:00

It all started with the girls having friends over... parents = 1 kids = 7. Time to drop off all friends, requests for friends to stay for dinner, completely denied. 20 min later, finally leave to take kids home. Drop off all friends but one, and head to the library. Books were due, it had to be tonight. 3 min in the library, Allie comes and explains that she just couldn't hold it anymore (would have been nice to know she was holding it in the first place). After 2 years of being potty trained we had our first public accident. Go figure. Took her and Madi (so that she wouldn't be by herself) out to the car, stripped off the wet pants and got her buckled into her carseat with a towel under her hiney. Go back in to retreive all the other kids (including the neighbor kid) and to actually check out the books. Come back out, 5 min later, to a cop walking away from my van. Oh crap. Get to the car and ask Madi what was going on. She explains that she just talked to the cop. He wanted to know where her mother was and how old she is. Oh crap. Madison tells me that she explained to him that her little sister peed her pants. Please, oh please, let that cop have children! If not, I might be getting someone knocking on my door, coming for my kids. I'll be honest, a few dollars in library fines might have been worth skipping this experience.

Eavesdropping

2009-12-23T09:11:00.000-08:00

With all the snow and single digit temperature days, I get to take the girls to school. I really enjoy it, even though we only live a 1/2 mile away from the school. That 3 minute drive provides all types of enjoyment. For example...

I was talking with my brother and we were comparing a story. I told him I thought it was all "BS". From the backseat I hear Hannah whisper to Madi, "Hey, what's 'BS'?"

Madi, in her great wisdom responded, "Um, I think it some type of swine flu."

That's good enough for me!

P.S. I'm hungry.

2009-11-08T10:01:00.000-08:00

We had the Buchanan's over for a game night this past week. Part of the game night tradition is to have treats. Usually we do chips and some sort of dip. As the kids were all downstairs, little Jack walked up with this note and handed it to me...

The scan is hard to read (click to make it bigger), so here is the translation...

11-6-09

Dear Dad,

Why are you and your friends keeping the chips to yourselves? We should get some! Why are you keeping us downstairs? Why are you not leting us play on the computer? I want to know please!

Love,

Madison

P.S. I'm hungry.

She got chips and wasallowed to play the computer. I wouldn't want her to go hungry!

Had she heard this conversation before?

2009-10-22T14:31:00.000-07:00

As parents there are many times that we find ourselves asking our children to wait so that we can finish what we are doing. This is the converstion I had with Allie today.

I said to Allie, " Honey, you need to come and get ready for gymnastics."

Allie, who is in the middle of an episode of Tom and Jerry, says "OK, in one minute, after I finish my show."

I laugh to myself and say ok, and proceed to head upstairs. She calls after me "You go find sump'n else to do for a lil' while. You know, play on the puter (computer) or sump'n."

Needless to say, she continues to make me laugh.

My Bad...

2009-09-30T23:06:00.000-07:00

This may be one of those "you had to be there" stories, but since I write this blog to help me remember these moments...I was there.

Allie was in the room while I was getting ready for work. She found one of Jenny's bras and being Allie, she tried it on. I thought it would be even better if Allie put her hoodie on over the bra and then walked in to show Jenny. It really did have a lot of potential.

However, as we were preparing the outfit, we ran into a problem. I pulled on the zipper and it came off in my hand. Allie looked up at me...slightly scowled and said in a flat tone, "What *paused* the *paused again* freak."

Without emotion, she continued, "That *pause* was not *pause* cool."

Sometimes that kid scares me.

Peruvian Headbands go Ninja

2009-09-25T19:15:00.000-07:00

I swear I don't make this stuff up.

Silly Dad...Tricks are for Kids

2009-09-25T19:06:00.000-07:00

I guess I've hit the point in life where my kids think they can use mind tricks on me. I have to admit, sometimes I give in because of their creativeness. For example...Allie. I am downstairs messing around on the computer and I hear her in the kitchen. This is never a good thing. So, I bellow up the stairs for her to get out of the kitchen. To which comes the sweet reply, "Okay, Daddy. I am getting out of the kitchen."

I then hear the pitter-patter of her little feet coming down the stairs. She parks herself right next to me and says, "Hey Dad, if you turn on a Scooby-Doo show for me, I'll give you what's behind my back."

"What's behind your back?"

Staying firm she says, "You have to turn on Scooby-Doo if you want it."

Not wanting to spoil her bribe, I turn on Scooby-Doo. She then provides me with a diet Mt. Dew saying, "I knew this would do it!"

P.S. Madison asked me today if I wanted to be President of the United States. She then informed me that I would have to go on vacation for 4 years if I wanted to do it.

I Never Win

2009-09-17T18:46:00.000-07:00

So Jenny went to some school reading class. I'm not sure why, I'm pretty sure she knows how to read...actually, it's a class on how to help your 1st grader learn how to read.

It was my job to watch the kids and get them to bed early. Being the diligent father that I am, when 7:30 arrived the children were jammy'd up, teeth brushed, and allergy medicined up. I send everyone to bed and proceed to get Jack ready. I even provided piggy back rides for Madi and Allie.

First, Jack goes down. No problem. Second and third are Hannah and Allie. Not as easy as Jack, but still not too bad. Madison's turn. As she heads down the hall, I give her a hug, kiss and wish her goodnight.

"Night Dad." almost like she is bored.

"Love you Madi." I say.

She responds, "Love you too Dad. But Mom loves me more."

What the?!?! Was that necessary?

Who's your Daddy?

2009-08-29T07:19:00.000-07:00

I called home to talk to Jenny this week. She was busy cleaning the bathrooms, so Allie answered the phone. The conversation went something like this...

Allie answered, "Hello?"

"Hi, Allie. Is Mom there?"

Somewhat accusative as well as inquisitive, "Who is this!?!"

"This is Dad." I replied.

"My Dad?" she asked?

How do you respond to that?

The Brutal Truth

2009-08-23T09:41:00.000-07:00

I am sure everyone has been witness to the brutal honesty of children. This honesty can be embarrassing at times. (Jenny can attest to the many time my kids have asked, "Why is that lady fat?" or "Is that a girl or a boy?" out in public.) Luckily for us this next bit occurred at the safety of our own breakfast table.

I get these tumors in my arm. On our recent trip to see the grandparents, Jenny's Dad removed a bunch of them from my arm. As we were sitting at the breakfast table, Allie leans over and touches the bandages on my arm. She then says, "Hey Dad, what happened to your arm?"

Trying to add a bit of drama I said, "That's where grandpa cut me open."

"Ewww, that is disgusting." (the 's' in disgusting is pronounced with a 'th')

"Yeah, it's not pretty is it?" I replied.

"Yeah, it's disgusting. You should put your shirt down to here (touching my wrist), so you don't disgust people at your work."

I guess it looked pretty bad.

Two days later, Allie and I went out to run some errands together. Since it was a Saturday morning, I had thrown on some shorts and a t-shirt. I grabbed my ball cap and we headed out. As we pulled out of the driveway, Allie looked up and noticed I was wearing my hat backwards.

With her impressive sense of fashion she warns me, "Dad, you better take your hat off or people will make fun of you, because you look weird."

Ouch.

Payback

2009-07-23T08:30:00.000-07:00

There comes a time in every child's life where they understand quid-pro-quo, tick for tack, what goes around, comes around. Hannah has learned this lesson.

We have a ridiculous amount of toys. They all take residence in what would be considered the "Home Teaching" room. Unfortunately, there are so many toys, no home teaching takes place in that room.

Hannah and Allie have been assigned to clean the what appears to be an explosion of toys. Unsupervised, this activity will take no less than 3 hours and have multiple fights. For whatever reason Hannah justified in her mind, she decided that Allie had offended her and that she would deliver the necessary justice.

If you know my children, you know that volume control is not something they have developed. After Hannah whacks Allie, an ear piercing scream comes from the toy room. This is the signal for Jenny to verify no blood has been spilt, but also a signal to Hannah that parents are on their way.

As Jenny approaches the toy room, she hears Hannah tell Allie, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Here, hurry, quick hit me. Hit me just like I hit you! Hurry, just hit me back!"

Life lesson learned.

Stealing our poop

2009-06-09T14:41:00.000-07:00

Well, this is my first blog posting. Scott told me to try it, here goes

About 3 weeks ago we had a dump truck full of compost delivered to our house. It was about 5 feet tall, and shortly after it was delivered our girls wanted to climb the mound. I explained that this was not ordinary dirt, but that it had sticks and some poop in it and that it wasn't the best stuff to play in.

Well, we had some extra, so we offered it to our neighbors. It was a nice day so all the windows were open. Our neighbor came over with her wheelbarrow and shovel, and started scooping up the compost. I hear from a distance Hannah and Allie calling out to her "what are you doing?"

Our neighbor says "taking your dirt."

Hannah & Allie yell at the same time "Moooooooooom!"

Hannah yells " Mom, the neighbor is taking our dirt!"

Allie then yells " Ya, she taking our poop, she's taking our poop!"

I couldn't help but laugh, and I can't even imagine what the rest of our street was thinking when they heard that.

Why I Love Madison!

2009-01-30T17:15:00.000-08:00

This is why I love Madison:

Allie is yelling from the bathroom that she just went poopers and needs help. So, up I get and head into the bathroom to perform my fatherly duties. Out of nowhere, Madison jumps out of the hall closet and says, "Dad! Did you know I was famous?"

"No, Madi. Why are you famous?"

"George Washington had red hair, but he wore a wig!"

"So, how does that make you famous?"

In her most exasperated tone she replies, "Dad, red hair. I have red hair, so does George Washington. I'm famous!"

Before I can respond she continues, "And this boy at school had a book with all the letters of my name!"

"What?"

Once again the exasperation sets in, "M-A-D-I-S-O-N...My full name is M-A-D-I-S-O-N, Madison!"

She then follows up with the kicker. "Aren't you happy to have someone famous in the family?"

"Absolutely!"

That's why I love Madison. But it gets better...Madison has already run through this exact same story with Jenny. But she added, "Mom, don't be surprised if the newspaper lady comes by asking for someone famous. You can tell her I live here!"

Now that's why I love Madison.

Banned the Pan

2009-01-19T15:17:00.001-08:00

Allie has taken up to name calling. As always, I blame television for these nasty habits. In this particular case, I have proof.

Rather than call me Dad or Daddy, she has decided I am now "You old cod fish."

I think she means it with love...

Should have listened.

2008-12-12T19:01:00.000-08:00

I fell down at work today. Total face planet into the carpet. I am not sure what happened, but I should have listened to Allie, "...and don't fall down."

Thanksgiving Trip

2008-12-01T18:33:00.000-08:00

As with any activity that requires us to leave the house, there is always adventure and humor attached to it. This past week we went to see Jenny's folks for Thanksgiving. This meant a plane trip. For at least two weeks prior to the trip, Hannah prayed that the plane wouldn't crash...she's 5, why is she even thinking about it? I need to limit her TV time.

Besides looking like a train wreck going through security, Allie decides she needs to "do it herself" in preparing for the march through the metal detector. She sits on the floor and pulls of her shoes and coat. Then she runs up the the bins and tosses them in. Unfortunately, she put them in some other lady's bin on top of her laptop!

We then proceed to make the long walk all the way to the Southwest gates at the very end of the terminal. All the while, a spectacle for everyone to behold. The girls run ahead looking for our gate number. As we reach the gate, the girls head left while Jenny and I head right to our gate.

We call the girls over to us and Madi and Hannah go plowing through the middle of a row of seats. Since they are not shy, they stepped (or attempted to crawl) around everyone. Allie on the other hand is too short to see where everyone went. She just hears my voice. So, I call her again.

Since she still can't see me, I walk half way to her until she can see me. She makes eye contact with me and then the little punk starts looking up at the ceiling (like angels are calling her) yelling, "Dad? Dad? Where did you go? Dad? Dad? Where are you?"

Half the airport thinks I ditched my kid and the other half is laughing hysterically at us.

P.S. Right before we boarded the plane, Allie runs across 8 chairs to a guy on a cell phone to exclaim, "I got a new scooter for my birthday!"

Can you teach shyness?

Daily Routine

2008-11-09T21:13:00.001-08:00

Monday through Friday, we do almost the same thing every day. The girls wake up between 6:30 and 7 am (heaven help me on that!) I roll out of bed shortly after them. Sometimes I watch a few cartoons with Allie or if I am in a hurry, I hit the shower.

Jenny gets up and starts getting the kids ready for school. Around 8 am, we sit down for breakfast. After breakfast is teeth brushing time. Following the teeth brushing is family prayer (which is always interesting). Then we do a family hug and good-bye kisses for Dad.

About 4 months ago, Allie decided to add a little spice to the routine. As I descend down the stairs to the garage she hollers, "Bye Dad! Do good at work! Have fun and don't fall down!"

Good call. Falling down at work sucks.

Favorite Quote

2008-11-02T20:29:00.000-08:00

Allie has two things she loves to say these days. Both make me laugh when delivered with her three year old lisp.

Anytime she sees a bug she says, "Dad, flies eat pooop." (she draws out the ewww in poop)

Second favorite...

As we drive in the car, if it starts to stink outside she says, "Dad, what's that smell?"

"I don't know Allie, what is that smell?"

"It's cow pooop."

Tough

2008-10-03T08:30:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Jenny had to run to the airport to pick-up her Mom. I thought I would help out by taking a long lunch to pick Hannah up from school and take her to lunch. First off, that kid can talk. She has also started to develop her trashing talking skills thanks to me!

We decided to hit Red Robin for lunch. We ordered some milkshakes. Hannah opted for chocolate and I went for the strawberry. When the shakes arrived, Hannah dug right in and ate all the whipped cream in one bite (she might have gotten that from me too). She then proceeds to peel the wrapper off her straw like it's a banana. Being pretty proud of herself she says, "Hey Dad, see what I did?"

"Yeah, that's pretty cool."

"So Dad, do you think you are tough enough to do that?"

Am I tough enough to rip the paper off the straw? It hurts that she had to ask!

Fast Sunday

2008-09-28T21:42:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been talking with your kids and realized you failed to explain something to them, but you've been talking to them about it for months. "Fast Sunday" is the topic I forgot to explain to Madison.

We are sitting in church and the girls are eating their snacks. We don't start challenging the kids to fast until their 8. Madi is still a few months away. Being the sweet little angel that she is, Madi offered me a fruit snack. Since it was Fast Sunday, I respectfully declined the snack and explained, "Thanks sweetie, but today is Fast Sunday."

Since I've never really explained Fast Sunday, Madi got a huge smile on her face and said, "You mean we get to leave right this meeting?"

Although I thought that wasn't such a bad idea I said, "No, we go without food on Fast Sunday."

Still trying to work it, she replied, "Right, so we need to be fast and get home so we can eat!"

If only it worked liked that.

15 minutes

2008-09-28T21:31:00.000-07:00

A sense of time is something that takes quite awhile for kids to get a firm understanding of. Allie still has no clue. We've been telling Allie that Mommy's birthday is next and then her birthday is after Mommy's. That made total sense to her.

Jenny's birthday came and it was a good day (minus the scheduling conflicts I caused). The next day Allie announces at the breakfast table that she is ready for her birthday party to start...in 15 minutes. It's was still two weeks away.

For the next two weeks Allie invited everyone she saw (old, young, friends, strangers) to her birthday party that would start in 15 minutes.

Poor kid...it was probably the longest 15 minutes of her life!

Soccer or Clean

2008-09-28T21:24:00.000-07:00

It always amazes me at the choices people make. Everyone has a different way of looking at things. Take Madison for example.

It's Saturday morning and I have made the painfully stupid mistake of signing my family up to clean the church building on Jenny's birthday. As if that wasn't dumb enough, I also double booked the cleaning with Hannah's soccer game. (This is why Moms run the house and not Dads).

Since it was Jenny's b-day, she opted to take Hannah to her game and let me clean the church. Allie choose to go see Hannah play soccer. Madison was asked which she would prefer, church cleaning or Hannah's game. I thought it was a no brainer. Madison thought for a moment and said, "Well, since I love Jesus, I better go clean the church."

I was so impressed. She then followed it up with, "Do we get to use those grabber things so we don't have to bend down to pick up the trash?" Ahh...the truth comes out...Madi just wanted to use the grabber.

Jack and the Girls

2008-08-06T19:44:00.000-07:00

Jack is 5 months now. This picture is a few months old, but I think it shows off the kids personalities pretty well.

Going Poolside

2008-08-06T19:23:00.001-07:00

For those of you that have seen me in the past 10 years, you know that I am fat. There's no hiding it. Madison, in her innocence, has not noticed. Could be that I've been a large man for her entire life.

That being said, Madison has decided to create a list of all the family activities that she would like to do before school starts. One is to go to a public pool. Jenny tries to graciously explain that "Daddy isn't big on going to the pool."

Madison does not accept this answer and asks the age old "Why not?" I quickly reply, because Dad is fat and shouldn't be seen in a swimsuit. (I say it more in teasing, I really am not a girl).
Bless her heart, Madison comes running across the room and gives me a hug saying, "Don't worry Dad. When I went to the pool with Aunt Jen, I saw lots of fat people in swimsuits. I am sure you would look just as good as them!"

Guess I have to go to the pool.

Back to School

2008-07-27T22:02:00.000-07:00

I like my job. I think I have a pretty good job. It pays the bills, gets me home at a descent time and has great perks. For some reason I get the vibe that my kids feel differently.

It's Saturday night dinner. Everything is very casual. The kids have been scattered around the house doing various activities. Madi and Hannah have been watching tv. Usually they are watching something we Tivo'd and skip through the commercials. Evidentally, this was not the case today.

As we are trying to figure out who-gets-what leftovers, Madison says, "Hey Dad, have you ever heard of Eagle's Gate College?"

"Umm, no." I replied.

"Well, you can go back to school there and get training for a better job."

"Thanks Madi, but I already have a good job."

"But, they get you out of your deadend job and into a job that can take you places."

I am seriously cutting back on the amount of tv that kid gets to watch.

Batter Up!

2008-07-04T14:35:00.001-07:00

Madi and Hannah opted to play softball this year. Actually, Hannah is too young for softball and tee ball, so she played kickball.

Both the girls said they enjoyed playing ball alot more than soccer. Both agreed there was too much running in soccer. Since Madi has never played softball, Jenny, the resident softball pro decided to practice with her. Madi had a great season. It overlapped with Jenny's city league games. Close to the end of the season, Jenny took Madi to watch one of her games.

"Favorite" Aunt Jen was also playing and it was her go at bat. Jen stepped up to the plate and was totally in the zone when Madi (keep in mind she has my volume control) decided she needed to pass on some words of encouragement to Jen.

"You can do it Jen!" Madi yelled. Then came the coaching, "Bend your knees Jen!" Followed by, "Keep your body turned! Keep your eye on the ball!" Jen, the umpire, the pitcher, and everyone else got a good chuckle.

Then it was Mom's turn up to bat. The first pitch was pretty weak, so Jenny let it go by for ball 1. With that, Coach Madison was back in action shouting, "Hey Mom, it's alright, but next time don't forget to swing!"

You gotta love a good coach.

Deep Thoughts by Madi

2008-06-23T23:15:00.000-07:00

Sundays are long days for us. The kids get restless, so Dad gets frustrated, so Mom makes everyone go for a walk to burn off their energy. So with the standard drama of trying to find shoes, not taking toys, and double checking the potty stop, we are out the door.

It's a pretty warm evening so I am carrying Jack, while Jenny herds the girls. About 1/3 of the way through the walk I notice that my boy, my only man child has chucked on my shoulder. Of course, it's a black shirt and white spit-up. So, I announce to the entire neighborhood, "Ahhh, Jack just barfed on my shirt."

Jenny, Hannah, and Allie couldn't care less. However, Madison is there to support me in my time of need. She looks up at me and provides her own words of wisdom. "Man Dad, that stinks! It sure would have been nice if Jack had spit-up in the bushes."

"Yes Madison, that would have been nice."

A Quick Clarification

2008-06-16T00:01:00.001-07:00

So, I think something is seriously wrong with my girls. Maybe I am to blame. Here's the story:

Once again, picture Jenny driving the girls home at the end of a pretty long day. Jenny is reviewing the expectations for getting ready for bed once we get home. It's a fairly simple list:

1. Go straight to your room and put your jammies on.
2. All clothes are dirty and need to be put in the hamper.
3. Brush your teeth and go potty.
4. No fighting.

Once Jenny declared rule number 4, she added, "This means no fighting, no yelling and screaming, no touching each other...etc."

Then Madison pipes up from the back seat, "I guess that means no wedgie wars too?!?"

Why are my kids obsessed with cramming their sister's undies up their tushies? It's totally Jenny's fault!!!

Everything in it's Order

2008-05-24T16:34:00.000-07:00

***Disclaimer***

This next story is too funny not to post, but please don't bring it up in front of Madison.

So, last week I had to take a business trip to Denmark. Of course, Madison does one of the funniest things she has ever done and I missed it. On one of the days I was gone, Jenny was running her standard parent errands. This included picking Madison up from school. Madison is hops into the car and says, "Mom, let's hurry home, okay?"

As any mother would, Jenny asks, "Why do we need to hurry home?"

"Well, today after my shower I forgot to put on underwear, so we need to hurry home to I can get put some on!"

Holding back the laughter Jenny inquires, "So, you don't have any underwear?"

Madison replies, "I forgot."

"Did you tell anyone at school that you forgot to wear underwear?"

"I told my teacher that I forgot."

"What did she say?" Jenny continued.

"She said that after school, I should hurry home and put some on."

Madison...the commando!

Confidence or Conceited?

2008-04-20T20:11:00.000-07:00

Sunday was a sick day for Hannah and me. Jenny took Madi and Allie while I chilled at home with Hannah and Jack. Jack slept. He always sleeps. Hannah wanted to play Mario Party 8 on the Wii.

While she played the Wii, I messed around on the computer. She very excitedly told me she was winning at Mario Party 8. Doing what I think any good father would do, I encouraged her to keep going.

Hannah then asks, "Dad, I'm so good aren't I?"

I smiled, "Yeah, you are pretty good."

To which she proclaimed, "I might be the greatest in the world!"

Dream Job

2008-04-20T19:59:00.000-07:00

This past week I was in the kitchen talking with Jenny about how sweet it would be if our company's stock was valued like Google or some other out-of-control public company. Madison must not have caught on to what I was talking about because she piped up with a new career path for me.

"Hey Dad! I know what you could do for a new job!"

"What should my new job be Madi?"

In her most serious of voices, "You should work at Sam's Club!"

Wondering why I should make this abrupt career change I asked, "Why's that?"

"Because that way when Mom and me are shopping at Sam's Club, we can come visit you on your aisle and see how your doing!"

Madi got extra dessert that night.

Man, they learn fast!

2008-04-12T09:19:00.000-07:00

Little Allie continues to amuse me. This next entry may reflect poorly on my parenting skills, but it's too funny not to share.

Poor Allie ran over her hand while riding her tricycle. Honestly, I don't know how you crash on a trike, but she did. Her injuries were very minor. She actually ran over her finger and had bruising under the fingernail.

Of course, it is her middle finger that she smushed. As you might imagine, Allie now flips everyone off when showing them her boo-boo. I find this to be humorous. I know I shouldn't, but I do.

Jenny and the girls came to my office for lunch last week. While there, my office neighbor, Veronica, came in to say hi to the family. I asked Allie to show Veronica her owie. Of course, she refused and I was left to bribing my 2 year old. After offering her some candy, Allie willing gave Veronica "the bird". It brought a good chuckle to everyone and Allie got her candy.

About 3 minutes later, Allie again ran up to Veronica. In one quick motion she flips her off saying, "See my owie!" Allie then immediately turns around sticks out her hand and says, "I have more candy now?"

Maybe I should have thought that through a bit more.

Home Teaching Companion

2008-04-12T09:12:00.000-07:00

Our ward recently split and I have a new home teaching companion. Just like any typical month, I waited until the last Sunday to do my home teaching. Unfortunately, my new companion had other plans and went North that Sunday.

Being a diligent home teacher, I set my appointments anyway and off I went. Since our ward constitutes only half of our neighborhood, most of my families are within walking distance. My first appointment was 4 houses down the street.

I am sitting in my first appointment, I've been there between 5 to 10 minutes and we are enjoying the "catch-up" conversations. All of the sudden their front door swings open (their house is layed out exactly like ours) and we hear "Hi guys, I'm ready to play!"

Lo and behold, little Allie has wandered out of our house, dinked around as she strolled down the street and walked right into the neighbor's house.

Hmmmm...maybe I need some sort of talking door that announces when my kids are coming and going.

The Contest

2008-03-23T10:58:00.000-07:00

I am not sure how they started it, but the girls had a self-inflicting wedgie contest the other day. Allie won.

Jack is here!!!

2008-03-10T20:00:00.001-07:00

Baby Jack arrived at 1:30 a.m. this past Thursday!

Discipling Allie

2008-03-10T19:42:00.001-07:00

Without question, Allie is our child with the most attitude. She's a total rebel. Every time you ask her do to something (or not do something) her first response is "no". You can even trick her by asking, "Do you want a treat?" Her first response is, "no...uhhh...yes".

So the other day we had another rebel moment. I can't remember what she did, but she earned herself a trip to time-out. When she arrived at the designated corner, she threw herself back and laid prone on the floor, screaming. Too bad for Allie, because that's not the way we do time-out at our house.

So I picked her up and took her to a new corner. She wailed through her 3 minute time-out. After which, I sat her down and did the all important parental review with a touch of love. So we talked.

If you have ever tried to have a serious conversation with a 3 year old child, you know it's challenging at best. This time was different. I was making a connection. She was staring up at me totally focused on what I was saying. We reviewed why she went to time out and how it was bad and that she shouldn't do it again. I told her I still love her, but she can't behave the way she did. It was an amazing Daddy-daughter moment until...she stuck out her little finger and said, "Daddy...boogie in your nose. I get it for you." And up my nose went her finger.

Yeah...my message really got through.

Hannah's Prayer

2008-03-04T21:16:00.001-08:00

So tonight as we put the kids to bed, I was in the room as Hannah was saying her bedtime prayer. Hannah has become very proficient in her prayers. She thanks Heavenly Father for all her stuff. She asks Him to make sure the new baby doesn't hurt Mom (because Jenny is very uncomfortable). She asks that her sisters will be good and listen. She thanks Him for everything.

In fact, she thanks Him for everything she has multiple times. Tonight she finished up her prayer with, "And thank you for everything we have, You're the best!"

I think that sums it up.

Dora, Dora, Dora

2008-02-14T21:27:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure what the household average is for watching television. Overall, I thought we were doing pretty good. Then Allie changed that perception for us.

As with most 2 year olds, Allie is obsessed with Dora. If it's not Dora, then it's her cousin Diego. Then it's back to Dora. As good parents should, we try to limit the time she spends watching TV. During non-TV times we try to get her to do learning activities. We work on numbers, colors, and other stuff.

I had no idea what a powerful influence Dora is. Allie is sporadically counting to 5. But the other day, as Jenny was jotting down the next week's menu, Allie starts counting, "Uno, dos, tres, quatro, cinco, seis, sieta, ocho!" What the pickles! She can count to eight in Spanish, but she doesn't count in English.

I can't decide whether to ban the TV or double the time she spends in front of it.

What Grown-ups say

2008-02-13T13:14:00.000-08:00

So a few weeks ago, we had the carpets cleaned, never buy a house with white carpet. So Jenny and the girls have been banished to the basement as the upstairs carpet dries. Jenny is working on a quilt for the baby and Madi is in the room working on her homework.

As she is working Jenny finds a mistake in her quilt square. In her frustration she says, "Darn it pickles!" Literally, she quoted Higglytown Heros and said, "Darn it pickles!"

Madison looks up from her homework with a slightly confused face and said, "Mom, I thought grown-ups say, Oh crap!"

Holy Pickles, kids hear everything!

Diet Time

2008-01-27T20:29:00.000-08:00

How do you know when it's time to go on a diet? Maybe it's when your pants d0n't fit. Maybe it's when your shirt buttons scream for mercy. Maybe your 2 year old and 4 year old help you out.

Allie's new source of entertainment when I carry her is to gently pinch my cheeks and say in a very soft voice..."Chubby cheeks. Chubby, Chubby, Chubby."

I also started the new Nu Skin weightloss program. It has meal replacement shakes. So as I was making an afternoon shake, Hannah asked me what I was doing. I responded, "Making a shake."

"Can I have one?" she asked.

"No, these shakes are so Daddy isn't fat anymore." I replied.

I then proceed to join my family at the table for lunch. Sipping my shake, Hannah says, "Dad, I can still see your fat."

I guess I need to drink more shakes.

Deep thoughts by Madi

2007-12-25T16:44:00.001-08:00

So, I made this rocking bean dip the other night. We had company over and we devoured most of it. There was just enough left to make it worth saving. (It's bean dip, one more bite is worth saving. Bean dip is second only to nacho cheese.)

After church Madi, Hannah, and I were treating ourselves to the leftover dip. I asked them how they liked it. Hannah thought it was too spicy. Madi said, "Dad, when I grow up and have my own place, will you send me this recipe?"

Yeah...it's that good.

Oh the things kids say...

2007-12-12T22:32:00.000-08:00

Today is Christmas and overall it's been a really good day. I'll get to that later. Before I forget, I wanted to share some conversations I've had with the kids.

Conversation with Madison and Hannah: (We are playing video games on the Nintendo Wii)

As we play our game, we are told to go to the ranch to find true love. Hannah asks, "Why do we need to find true love?" Madi promptly replies, "Hannah, everyone has a true love. Dad has a true love, Mom has a true love, and I have a true love."

As a father, I quickly decide that Madi is too young for a true love (although I believe this is her third or fourth one).

"Who is your true love, Madi?" I asked.

"Parker." (Parker is a kid at school and is also in her church class.)

"I think you are too young to have a true love."

"Okay Dad, I'll break up with him." This made me wonder if something official had been put in place so I had to ask, "Are you guys going out?"

A look of confusion spread across her face. I have to admit, it gave me a bit of relief as she asked what "going out" meant.

I avoided that question with a question, "Does Parker know you are his true love?"

Madi sighed, "Yeah, I accidently told him on the second day of school. It just kind of slipped out."

Madi is definitely going to give us problems when she gets older.

The Critic

2007-11-26T18:50:00.000-08:00

I walked out to the dining room on Sunday to find that Madison had busted open the newspaper and was reading the funny pages. So, being a quality parent, I asked a lame question, "So, Madison whatcha doing?"

Madison replied, "Reading the newspaper. I already read this page and now I am reading this page."

Once again I showed my amazing powers of observation. "Your reading the funny pages."

Madison looked up over the top of her glasses and plainly stated, "Yes, but I don't think they are very funny."

You've got to love the honesty of children.

4 Girls and 2 Guys

2007-11-23T20:02:00.000-08:00

It won't be long until we can rename this blog! Our first man child is on the way! Jenny is due in March. Having given up on the possibility of having a boy, we have no names for this poor kid. Everything I come up with gets veto'd. I hate getting veto'd. I think I will humor Jenny and name the boy what I want when she isn't looking.

In the Beginning...

2007-11-19T17:31:00.000-08:00

How else do you start out a blog but by confessing, this is our first stab at blogging. The goal is to put something up a few times a month so that family and friends can share in the experience of raising our family.

Here's the run down:

Our Oldest - Madison - Drama queen describes her to perfection!
The Middle - Hannah - Bless her heart, she has more energy than her little body can handle.
The Youngest - Allie - Determined to keep up with her sisters no matter what!
The 1st Man Child - We haven't picked a name yet, but it's our first boy. Scott was more surprised then anyone.

At any given time, anything can and does happen at our house. For example, we awoke this week to a crash from the downstairs bathroom and Hannah calling out, "MOM, DAD!!! Allie, broke the bathroom mirror." Seriously, it wasn't even 7 am.

Pray for us!